Passing the reigns

I think it is time to pass the reigns. I complain about my husband not doing enough for me or being pro active enough with our son but in reality he does a good job. I’ve come to realize that I may have a bit of a problem just one day after beginning my New Years resolution of taking more time for myself. I have a tendency to be a little controlling. I’m not the creative free spirit may of my friends are. I am a controlled creative and that just can’t be good. You just have to look in obvious places and my bad habit is screaming out. Hanging in my closet all my clothes all face the same direction divided by category of shirt, sweater, dress, skirt, pant and each section orderly from short to long. There will be no sweatpants intermixed with my stack of denim. My sock all have mates and they are folded together nicely in the drawer together. Black t-shirts with black t-shirts and everything folded and stack as if you were in a store. Maybe it was my years of working in retail that infested me with crisp folds and straight stacks but I can’t stop and my compulsion doesn’t stop there. Just look in the kitchen cabinets or the towels in the bathroom. It’s like the famous saying, ‘A place for everything and everything in its place.’ Only my desk has escaped this strange game of Tetris my mind plays of neatly fitting all the pieces together. What I mean by all of this is that I may have become a bit overbearing with my clothes, my house and with my son since he was born. He and I just spent so much time together in the first 6 months of his life because of his relentless breastfeeding that my husband never really had the opportunity to get to know him the way I did. I just found it easier to take over every situation and get it under control rather than let my husband figure out how to be a dad. Now my son is a year old and gets a long just fine. He’ll let you know when he is thirsty, tired or hungry. He doesn’t need to be micromanaged and I don’t want to be that type of mother. It is time for me to let go and let my husband take over a bit more. It is scary and I may just start organizing my desk to fill the compulsive void but I think things will all run a little smoother now.