Morning Mountain

It’s New Year Day at dawn. The house is dark and quiet and I have found a place for my thoughts. No babbling toddler pulling at my thigh, no husband trying to escape into his cave in the back yard. Only the jingle of the dog’s collar, as he scratches himself, and the click of keys as my fingers lay my voice to the page. Aahhh! Silence is awesome.

I’ve decided my goal this New Years is to find more time for myself. I have found one place that my thoughts can run wild and uninterrupted. It is in a place called 5:00 am. Recently a fellow mother of two young children, who is also my neighbor, and myself have discovered, that we can still get a little peace of mind together by hiking Eaton Canyon before dawn. We leave the kids and husbands at home tucked in their beds all warm and dreaming of their dreams and we grab our flashlight, jump in the car and head about 2 miles up the street where the San Gabriel Mountains meet suburbia. We walk in the pitch dark with wildlife rustling in the bushes, muddy twisting trails sheer, and cliffs. We make our way up to a precipice, looking over the city of Los Angeles as the sun rises and we both find our moment of peace and calm that helps us get through the loud chaos of the upcoming day. My husband thought we were crazy and irresponsible. Last summer there was a brown bear the size of my car in a tree six doors down and we’ve seen the coyotes cruising the streets for small pets early in the morning. He pointed out that bears and mountain lions don’t hibernate here in Southern California and that we are putting ourselves in outrageous and selfish danger. Well, that maybe but I’m not giving it up. When she is unavailable, I still wake at 5am, grab my flash light and power walk alone from my house all the way uphill to the entrance of the Canyon and back again. This is the only excitement or alone time I’ve found. Hiking by moonlight with the threat of bears, lions or coyotes having me for breakfast…what am I doing? Maybe my husband is right? Maybe I should have considered an affair instead. There would be elements of danger and excitement, but that would mean another man in my life and still no alone time. No dick is worth that. Fuck it! I’ll take my chances with wild animals. Mountain here I come.